Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
