So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
No more Irish car bombs ever.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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