Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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