Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
