Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
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