My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
