girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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