But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
