I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Mom said you looked used
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
