i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
