no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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