just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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