my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
should my penis look like a turkey
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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