they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
