idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize