apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize