I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
