Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
