I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
