But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
