I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
