hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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