Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
