3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
