So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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