she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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