and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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