I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
