Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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