he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize