You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
