just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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