Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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