Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
