Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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