I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
