I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
