ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
