Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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