Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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