So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize