she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
