so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize