one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
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