we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
my vag is so smooth its legendary
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Randomize
