Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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