Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
