I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
