where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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