porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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